Inklings

As people become more comfortable with the tools of social media, a disturbing trend seems to be afoot — familiarity breeding contempt, as the saying goes.

Let’s talk about making new connections via LinkedIn, for example. Because there’s a screen — and maybe even an entire continent – between you and the person you’re inviting to connect, many people don’t stop to think that the basic “face to face” networking rules still apply.

Consider this: You’d never dream of darting up to a stranger or vague acquaintance, shoving a business card in their hand, and saying “Yo! Call me!” before running away, right? You just might be doing the online equivalent of this bad behavior on LinkedIn.

On a weekly basis, I receive invitations from strangers – or at the very least, someone whose name I don’t recognize. I meet lots of people in my travels, and my aging memory is not what it used to be. So I’m always grateful for even the vaguest of contexts – “Hi, I’m a fellow member of the XYZ group. I enjoyed your elevator pitch at the last meeting. I’d love to connect with you on LinkedIn.”

Sure, we’ve all figured out by now that if you indicate someone’s a “Friend,” LinkedIn accepts your claim at face value. But why leave it at that and risk being ignored? Customize the deadly dull default message, add some brief context, and guess what – that small effort will make you really stand out as someone worth knowing.

After all, isn’t that the point?

Remember that SNL skit with David Spade as the receptionist from hell? His famous line, delivered in the most condescending of tones, was “…and you are?” Sure, it was hilarious when he didn’t recognize Jesus Christ, but maybe not so funny in the real world when your overly aggressive gatekeeper is actually chasing business away.

This week, we’re working on testimonial-gathering for a large public agency, calling S/M/W/BEs who have successfully secured construction contracts. These companies’ comments will potentially be featured in some upcoming marketing materials — talk about priceless exposure, as well as a chance to reinforce the relationship with a valued business partner.

Though most of the companies we’ve connected with couldn’t be nicer or more responsive, a select few seem to have installed Dante’s vision of the gatekeeper from hell. I understand they’re just doing their job — because if they didn’t, they soon would be out of a job — but that nasty, “I-know-you’re-some-loser-trying-to-waste-my-boss’s-time” presumptive attitude is completely alienating regardless of why I’m calling.

Case in point from my days with the New York Daily News. I was tasked with finding a vendor to handle the creation of new POP newspaper racks, a project that had a fairly substantial price tag attached to it. Calling a highly respected manufacturer, I barely got out, “Hi, my name is Lisa Fahoury and I’m calling from the Daily N…” before this particular gatekeeper assumed I was a Daily News telemarketer and started ripping me a new one.

“Listen, I told you f-ing people to stop calling here!! Are you just stupid or maybe you don’t speak English??!! F-you!” I listened in stunned silence as she slammed down the phone.

WOW. I called her back and gleefully explained that she now had a super-fun task — going into her boss’s office and explaining that her being a complete a-hole just cost their company a shot at a six-figure contract. Buh-bye.

So to all the bosses out there, I pose this question: Is being so aggressively protected worth the chance of alienating a caller who might’ve been your next big account? If you ask the companies who won’t be seeing themselves in the next Port Authority of NY & NJ brochure, I’m betting the answer is no.

Regardless of how you feel about Derek Jeter or the NY Yankees (now, don’t be a hater), ya gotta admit that Christian Lopez is a class act. Rather than cashing in, this 23-year-old kid catches Jeter’s long-awaited 3,000-hit ball and hands it back to him.

Of course, no good deed goes unpunished, and Lopez is apparently on the hook for a significant tax bill for all the stuff the Yanks gave him in return for his noble gesture.

But no worries. Up steps Miller High Life with the perfect save — along with some picture-perfect brand reinforcement. The beer barons, among others, agreed to cover Lopez’s tax liabilities so this poster child for “living the high life” could continue to enjoy the dream that has indeed become his life these days.

In the process, they also managed to one-up Budweiser, the official beer of the Yankees, with all the massive publicity and goodwill they’ve gained.

Combined with the High Life’s ongoing support of returning military vets, it looks like we’ve crowned a new king of beers.

It started out as the occasional piece in our mailbox, blaring offers like, “Call the home country for less than 8 cents a minute!”

Now, it’s getting more and more frequent — offers to reap the full blessings of Ramadan, or to enjoy the Arabic Elite Super Pack TV channel package.

What exactly is “it?” Marketing gone awry.

Nothing drives my husband (a U.S.-born direct marketing professional) nuts faster than being on the receiving end of a wasted marketing effort — specifically, the lazy practice of what’s called the “ethnic select.” That’s when you take a creative guess as to perceived ethnicity when sourcing prospects for a mailing.

Because the last name Fahoury is of Middle Eastern origin, we often end up on these lists. Or, more accurately, my husband does, as the male head of household. But as a second-generation American born in Asbury Park, NJ, the only “home country” he knows is the USA.

I cannot imagine a less effective way to spend valuable marketing dollars, so I turned to our friends at Prompt Mailers, a leading direct marketing solutions provider, for their take on the practice. Prompt’s Steve Elias offers this insight: “The ethnic select or overlay is easy to do — many data companies offer ethnic coding as a service. It worked maybe 40 years ago, but in today’s more integrated world, it’s much tougher to make accurate assumptions about someone’s ethnicity.”

Though he sees the value of ethnic overlays in some situations, Steve counsels marketers to be mindful of their creative so as not to offend anyone. “You definitely run the risk of annoying some people, never mind wasting the $$ you spent on design, production, lists & postage.”

When the average per-piece cost of direct mail heading northward of $1, there has to be a more cost-effective way to ensure it’s reaching an audience that is receptive to your message. With the sophisticated data analytics now available to even small business marketers, guessing — no matter how “educated” — has no place in contemporary marketing.

Had an interesting email exchange recently with a firm that came highly recommended by a colleague.

We had touched base a few months back on a possible “meet & greet” with one of our clients, but that got tabled until the second quarter. In the meantime, same client had a different need this firm could handle, so I sent over the specs for an estimate.

Never heard back, but recognizing that emails occasionally go astray, I shot them a follow-up. Same result — nothing.

Today, the recipient reached out asking for an update on the proposed meeting…using the thread of the email request he’d ignored. Twice.

Out of morbid curiosity more than anything, I expressed my surprise. Here’s his response: “Sorry. It was sent when I was on vacation and then the holidays came. Just figured we missed a really good opportunity. Kinda mad at myself about that. Was a vendor selected?”

Is this how business gets done these days? Really? I’d be mortified if I got busted like that. And probably not ballsy enough to check in on the status of the original meeting — especially using the email thread I’d chosen to ignore.

Curious if I’m a) missing something, b) overreacting, or c) holding our company to a standard of responsiveness that’s no longer necessary. Especially since this guy’s managed to build what seems like a pretty successful operation.

Thoughts?

Shopping at Target over the holidays, I spotted a Friskies “Holiday Case” of cat food that featured a bonus toy and treats for our three furry friends at home.

Smart to cater to fanatical pet owners who include their pets in their holiday gift-giving. Even smarter was the selection of the freebie — a “Snack-O-Sphere” foraging toy designed to be filled with Friskies treats.

Unspeakably brilliant move by the Purina marketing team — a fun little freemium that not only builds goodwill, but actually facilitates increased consumption of your product.

Today’s challenge — what can you give away that encourages the same?

By now, we’ve all heard about the Katy Perry/Sesame Street debacle.

But here’s the question: Have you actually seen the footage? Talk about a tempest in a teapot (or a controversy in a C-cup, for that matter).

Overblown, in my opinion. Will kids — many of which come into more intimate contact with boobs every day when they’re breastfed — even take notice of Perry’s cleavage? Or will they simply be entertained by the song’s catchy bassline as Elmo and Perry run around Sesame Street?

Trust me, I’m in complete agreement that kids and oversexualized images don’t mix. But the coverage made a fairly innocuous segment sound like the Pam Anderson sex tape, for goodness’ sake.

Thoughts?

It’s been the adventure of a lifetime so far. Reactions have ranged from “You go, girl!” to “You’re nuts, honey!”

What’s causing all the hubbub? This Saturday, I’m going under the clippers at a St. Baldrick’s event to raise money for childhood cancer research — going bald in solidarity with kids battling this terrible disease.

In the 10 years of its existence, St. Baldrick’s has raised nearly $90 million in research funds — proof that one person, one shaved head, even one dollar can make a difference in the fight against childhood cancer.

Did you know that every three and a half minutes a kid is diagnosed with cancer? I sure didn’t. It seemed worthy of a bold statement (make that a bald statement LOL) to help raise awareness.

If you happen to find yourself in the northern NJ area this Saturday, come on by to cheer on us brave “shavees.” The festivities start at 3PM at The Friendly Sons of the Shillelagh Club, 648 Prospect Ave, West Orange, NJ 07052. Or, feel free to support the cause with a donation large or small.

Despite tremendous progress, cancer remains the #1 disease killer of children in the U.S. and Canada. Compared to a child’s struggle, shaving my head is the smallest of sacrifice.

So if you see me bald come Monday, you’ll know it’s for the most important of causes — healthy, happy children.